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Two and a Half Men

12 seasons · 2003 · Ended

★★★★★3.8

Comedy

A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.

Episodes

Pilot

S01 · E01 PilotSeptember 22, 2003

Big Flappy Bastards

S01 · E02 Big Flappy BastardsSeptember 29, 2003

Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

S01 · E03 Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of HellOctober 6, 2003

If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap

S01 · E04 If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a NapOctober 13, 2003

The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump

S01 · E05 The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a HumpOctober 20, 2003

Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

S01 · E06 Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?October 27, 2003

If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

S01 · E07 If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually FakeNovember 3, 2003

Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful

S01 · E08 Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-FulNovember 10, 2003

Phase One, Complete

S01 · E09 Phase One, CompleteNovember 17, 2003

Merry Thanksgiving

S01 · E10 Merry ThanksgivingNovember 24, 2003

Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

S01 · E11 Alan Harper, Frontier ChiropractorDecember 15, 2003

Camel Filters and Pheromones

S01 · E12 Camel Filters and PheromonesJanuary 5, 2004

Sarah Like Puny Alan

S01 · E13 Sarah Like Puny AlanJanuary 12, 2004

I Can't Afford Hyenas

S01 · E14 I Can't Afford HyenasFebruary 2, 2004

Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick

S01 · E15 Round One to the Hot Crazy ChickFebruary 9, 2004

That Was Saliva, Alan

S01 · E16 That Was Saliva, AlanFebruary 16, 2004

Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats

S01 · E17 Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the HatsFebruary 23, 2004

An Old Flame with a New Wick

S01 · E18 An Old Flame with a New WickMarch 1, 2004

I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

S01 · E19 I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember YouMarch 22, 2004

Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

S01 · E20 Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the DarkApril 19, 2004

Cast

Ashton Kutcher

Ashton KutcherWalden Schmidt

Jon Cryer

Jon CryerAlan Harper

Conchata Ferrell

Conchata FerrellBerta